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[scene: Unknown “extra” is windexing the top of the wooden lobby desk as cast members enter 350 East 52nd Street lobby.   Who is this man who has just let us walk right by and smiled?  And why is he windexing the desk?]

As we gear up for our big weekend Con Edison special episode, we offer you a preview of the newest ‘staff’ members –  just to assure you that you are on the right channel.  With all of the recent changes, without proper introduction, you would be likely to become as confused as the resident cast members are as they regularly see new ‘extras’ manning (or not) the front desk.

First we are delighted to inform you that the snarling “building manager”  JJ, has been fired. He will no longer be a part of our show and cast members are thrilled to be able to walk through the lobby and not hear JJ swearing at, or firing someone, in the middle of the lobby.  His last day was Friday, February 10th.

Earl, the former daytime doorman will play the part of building manager.  Daniel, the former weekend porter will be the daytime doorman.  Daniel’s brother Julien will replace Daniel as the weekend porter –  but until Darien  gets back from his vacation, Julien will fill in for Darien from 3:00 – 11:00. Except not everyday – as in yesterday, when in Darien / Julien’s shift was covered by the windexing stranger. Raymond, another porter has taken some time off from the show to recover from a car accident he had several weeks ago on his way to pick up the UPS packages for 350 East 52nd Street.  He visited last weekend but declined to be shown on camera because he is in a neck brace as a result of injuries he suffered from the accident.  Chris, the weekend porter, has also been filling in as doorman recently. Resident cast members are unclear as to whether he is auditioning for the part on a regular basis, or just filling in for someone unknown, in which case, the weekend porter is a mystery.  Finally, the night shift;  Joey will still be the weekend guy and Ranfi works weeknights at the moment.

[“Breaking News”  scrolls across bottom of screen.  
We interrupt this program for a special announcement.  The following news has just been reported from a resident cast member:  {1:00 am}
“Just wanted everyone to know, whoever the doorman is right now, the night guy who is incredibly rude, left our front door wide open and when I came in to yell he was passed out at the from desk. I walked right by him and I definitely wasn’t the only one.”]

Back to our regularly scheduled program . . .

William Koeppel has been in town this week which has been quite unpleasant for our striking workers.  He continues his child-like behaviors hurling insults at our staff each time he comes to the building.  WK continues to lie with his usual frequency and had told some good ones this week.  He told Sammy that the strike was over because he had “bought them out” (??????)   and even better, he told people that “Kirk’s law suit was thrown out”  as well.  Although it’s a class action suit with 10 plaintiffs & will benefit all of the tenants paying market rents in our rent stabilized building, WK insists it is “Kirk’s law suit.” The cast wonders how much time he invests in dreaming up these lies and, if he thinks anyone actually believes a word that comes out of his mouth.

WK has been after Con Edison for some time now to hook up the pipes to the new gas heating system but they refuse to cross the picket line.  Rumor has it that this is the weekend BK is demanding Con Ed install the pipes.  Con Edison has blocked off the street in the front of 350 E. 52nd Street with many bright orange cones, prohibiting street parking.  This is normally legal parking space from Friday eve at 7:00 through the weekend.  There is one lone car that is parked in the prohibited area and Con Ed said it would be towed by 6:30 am if it remained.  Being that no advisory signs were placed on the block by Con Edison, we wonder if it would be legal for them to tow it.  Striking doormen have promised to arrive by 6:00 am to protect our street and sidewalk from being dug up and, the car! There is a rumor that Modern Staffing will send ‘security personnel’ to deal with our striking doormen.   Stay tuned!